A normal day

I want to get this down. I want to cherish each of these before things get gnarly again in January. I’ve created a very good routine for myself, and I want to celebrate it. I want to remember what Normal looked like, because I’m willing to fight for it. I’m willing to die on my goddamn porch for this and the neighborhood we’re a part of. I love the East Bay and the life I have here.

This is a boring post, but I lead a beautifully suburban life at this point, and I like that my life is boring.

Monday

I wake up around 6a and make myself some decaf quietly, with doors closed, so as not to wake up Reed. Holiday is under foot, North is cuddling Reed. Locke’s yellow light clock won’t indicate it’s ok to be out of bed until 7, at which point he plays quietly until the light turns green at 7:30. I check in on work to see what the week has in store, and knock out a few tasks to get things in order, and take the cats through their morning routine (play outside, scoop litterbox, feed). Between 7:30 and 8, I see Locke and Reed a bit while they do morning things, and I get myself in order for the work day.

At 8, I ride my bike for 15 minutes to the shuttle, hang out with my shuttle buddies in line, and then do email and Slack and meeting prep for the ~90 minute shuttle ride. I work for 5 hours with 1ish hour for lunch from Apple Park, focused on securing our users’ devices from state sponsored attacks and intimate partner surveillance alike. I take an hour away from my desk to pick up heavy things and set them down again gently. Then I spend 90 on the shuttle debriefing from meetings and doing focus work, ride my bike 15 minutes home, and then have dinner with Locke and Reed.

I read something relatively light in bed and fall asleep by 9p.

Tuesday

I wake up at 5:30a and make myself a cup of decaf quietly. I make Locke’s breakfast and lunch, both in Bentgo boxes, take the cats out for their morning cavort in the back yard before feeding them, and take an early morning meeting. At 7:30a I get Locke up and dressed, reminding him it is a “breakfast at preschool day.” He is always excited about this. I drop him off blocks away at school with his meals by bike, leave his helmet there, and head back home to grab a different bike and go to the shuttle stop. Same routine there.

I return home from work with just enough time to drop off my shuttle bike, grab a bike Locke can be on, and pick him up from preschool. We usually cook dinner together and play some. His bedtime routine after dinner is to wash hands brush teeth, pick out PJs and books, use the toilet, read the books (right now nearly exclusively Pete the Cat), and then I sit in the dark with him for a few minutes while his eyes adjust. We hold hands in the dark but don’t talk.

I read something relatively light in bed and fall asleep by 9p.

Wednesday

I wake up around 6a and make myself some decaf quietly. I make Locke’s lunch and take the cats out. I do a bit of work to get in front of things, and get Locke up at 7:30a. He has the option of breakfast and play at home, or breakfast and play at the coffee shop. Regardless of which he choses, if he does a good job in the morning cooperating and being a good sport, he gets to ride his balance bike to preschool and/or we stop over at the construction site to watch workers building the new playground. There are LOTS of questions along the way.

Reed and I do our injections in the morning, me of both testosterone and a peptide. The T is relatively easy to come by — I have an accommodating medical team, but being a controlled substance, I have to go pick it up myself from the pharmacy.

I work from home, focusing on meetings in the morning and deep work in the afternoon. I pick up Locke around 5:30p, and we either go to the farmer’s market and library with Reed or we stay home and cook. I do the same bedtime routine with Locke. Sometimes it’s a fight, sometimes it’s smooth, but it’s always cherished.

I read something relatively light in bed and fall asleep by 9p.

Thursday

I wake up at 5a and quietly make myself a cup of caffeinated coffee. I check my bike over and pack my work kit, feed the cats, and then ride the 50 miles from home to Apple Park. It takes me 4ish hours of listening to music and being alone with my thoughts. I pull 5ish hours in the office like usual and then ride the shuttle home.

I sometimes have a date with one of my sweeties, or we have dinner with a neighbor.

I read something relatively light in bed and fall asleep by 9p.

Friday

I wake up around 6a and make myself some decaf quietly. I reach out to Quinn and whoever else I’m supposed to be having friend checkins with that morning. I take the cats out for their morning routine and maybe have some breakfast.

I work from home and spend the day on focused work, doing any medical things I have (including KAP), and meeting with friends locally for lunch. Reed and I have date night every other week — sometimes an adventure or fancy meal, and sometimes staying in and watching a movie. Locke sometimes sleeps over at Yolanda’s those nights and sometimes is home in time for bed. When it’s not Reed and my date night, I’ll often have a date with someone else or time with a friend or even just to myself.

I collapse into bed by 9:30p, usually without reading anything.

Saturday

I wake up at 6:30a and quietly make myself a cup of caffeinated coffee. I have morning routine with cats and check on my side projects. Locke and I spend the morning together at home or at the coffee shop playing and eating, and Yolanda takes over at 9a. Reed and I (and often others!) go on a bike ride in the East Bay hills based on what our fitness levels can handle. We talk about bike parts, child rearing, and community philosophy.

We’re home by 4p, at which point Locke and I hang out. Right now, we’ve been throwing Crate a birthday party for the past week or more — changing lights in the room, piling pillows and blankets onto his bed to make it “special,” and drawing birthday-related things that then get taped to the walls. We sometimes visit with a neighbor or friend, but stick close to home for dinner with Reed and regular bedtime routine.

I read something relatively light in bed and fall asleep by 9p.

Sunday

I wake up at 6:30a and quietly make myself a cup of caffeinated coffee. I take the cats out for their morning routine, and then I do personal chores and side projects. I don’t usually leave my office until 3p when Locke gets up from his nap.

Locke, Reed, and I hang out. We play throughout the house, or go on a bike ride, or whatever. Throw Crate another birthday party. Around 4:30p, we make up our contribution to neighbor dinner. At 5:30ish, we meet up with our neighbors, our kids play, and we talk like humans do while eating dinner. Sometimes we even get a board game in.

I collapse into bed by 9:30p, usually without reading anything.