Pride

Sometimes people ask me how many of my students made the IMO, and if I’m in a bad mood I often give the super snarky reply, “I lost track”.¹

That’s actually a white lie. The real answer is “I deliberately don’t keep track”. And in this post I want to explain why.

It’s definitely human nature to be happy when your students succeed, the same way it’s human nature to be happy when your selfies get hearts. In moderation, that seems fine. I think it’s unlikely I ever reach a point where I never brag about OTIS at all.

But there is a fine line between the following two implications:

• “I’m super proud of my kids, look what they did.”
• “I’m super proud of myself, look what my kids did.”

Without naming anyone in particular, I have seen some instances which I felt were clearly on the wrong side of this line.

When done wrong, this violates a lot of my basic principles. I think it’s important that my students “own” their journeys, and I always remind myself contests are ultimately for the students. I think it’s not cool to use students as pawns for public relations.²

As an example of a mistake I made in this direction, in late 2022 I floated the idea of having an OTIS alum survey. I rapidly got feedback this felt super dark-artsy and closed the issue. This probably means I’m doomed to having the occasional “wait, you made IMO?” kind of conversation, but so be it.

Status is an Elder God whose power is consistently underestimated³. So this post is yet another reminder to myself that wanting to help others is different from wanting to be recognized as a person that helps others, and I’ll be the first to admit this is something I still struggle a lot with.