No, no, no; yes, yes, yes

I have a close friend who is in the habit of saying, "no, no, no; yes, yes, yes", "yes,yes,yes; no, no, no", "yes, no", "no, yes", etc., etc., usually accompanied by various, animated hand and head gestures.  There are many fine gradations of the degree to which he agrees or disagrees with you, though normally his pronouncements reflect a combination of agreement and disagreement.

What he means by these locutions depends upon the degree to which he is in agreement with you.

I find this trait of his to be quite natural and endearing.

BTW, this friend is one of the smartest people I have ever known.

I just observed two Chinese men in the Swarthmore COOP engage in this conversation:

A "no, yes; yes, no"

B "yes, no; no, yes"

I also have Chinese friends who are accustomed to pet phrases (kǒutóuchán 口頭禪) such as bùbùbù 不不不 ("no, no, no") and duìduìduì 對對對 ("right, right, right"), repeated any number of times, but seldom in combination or alternatedly.

 

Selected readings

• "Yeah no" (4/3/08) — must read
• "Yes-no questions in mathematics and in Chinese" (2/10/17)

Afterword

I am acquainted with a few people who seem to have an aversion to "yes" (I call this trait "yes aversion" [remember "moist aversion"?]), I know not why, but they will generally only say / write "yeah".  They avoid the particle "yes" as much as my wife used to avoid the pronoun "I".

I guess the final "-s" of "yes" requires the expenditure of extra / unnecessary energy, so they just omit it.  Or maybe they want to project an aura of nonchalance.

Or maybe "yes" is too straightforwardly affirmative for their taste / character.