Tragically, we’re going to have to nuke Florida

There is something deeply, deeply wrong with the culture there, and it needs to be defeated.

In world war two, we did not negotiate a surrender with the Nazis. We did not negotiate a surrender with the Japanese. We nuked the Japanese twice in order to get unconditional surrender, he says. That needs to be the same here. There is something deeply, deeply wrong with this culture, and it needs to be defeated.

That’s GOP Rep. Randy Fine making a suggestion for a final solution of the Palestinian problem — just murder everyone in Gaza. They’re evil, don’t you know, every single one of them.

Judging his state on the basis of Randy Fine, Ron DeSantis, and Marco Rubio, I’m forced to conclude that we need to nuke them all until it sinks into the sea. I know it isn’t very humanist of me, but I’m defining “Floridian” as a word meaning “goblinoid,” and they’re fair game.

Can we wait a few days, though? I just ordered some black widows from a Florida company.

Also wait until Trump is vacationing in Mar-A-Lago. He’s frequently there, you won’t have to wait long.