DO NOT WANT

As a sop to the monstrous ego of our president, the US Mint is issuing a Trump coin this fall. It’s ugly, even if they used artistic license to clean up his decaying face.

Of course it’s a fake gold color.

Daniel Phelps informs me that the only president who had his portrait on a coin while he was alive was Calvin Coolidge; ominously, the Great Depression hit shortly after he left office, so let’s hope that’s not predictive. Julius Caesar was assassinated shortly after his ego prompted him to issue a coin with his face on it, so maybe that’s the correlation to hope for.

If I somehow got one of these things, I’d immediately turn around and ask for a dollar bill instead. If I couldn’t get a quick refund, if I’d have to hang on to it for a while, I have access to all kinds of acids and a Dremel tool. It would not return to circulation unmarred.

What would you do if given one of these abominations?