I saved London from being invaded by Cthulhu—and now you can, too

Fire Hazard

It might've passed you by, but London is currently being invaded by tentacled Cthulhian horrors. I know this because, just a few nights ago, I ran screaming from them in a park in Southwark. After I'd put about 100 yards between myself and the maddening soul-sucking beasts—really, I haven't run that far or that fast since school—I caught my breath, considered the poor life choices that had led me to this pitch black woodland path, and headed back into the fray. After all, that's why I had been invited to Southwark in the first place: to close the portals being used by the monsters to slip from their dimension into ours.