AITAH for Calling Out My Wife’s Infidelity with My Brother in Front of Our Families?

Hey everyone, I’m really struggling with a personal situation and could use some objective opinions. My (35M) wife (33F) and I have been married for eight years. We have two kids and, on the outside, seem like a happy couple. But I’ve recently discovered that she’s been cheating on me with my brother (38M).

It started with little signs I dismissed as stress or overthinking. Then I noticed a lot of secretive behavior—texts she’d hide, late nights out, and even her mood swings that I initially thought were just due to work stress. When I finally confronted her, she denied it at first, then confessed she and my brother had been having an affair for over a year. I was devastated, and she apologized, saying it was a mistake and she wanted to work things out.

Here’s where things get complicated. My brother is married with three kids. Our families are close, and we see each other often at family gatherings. I was furious and decided to confront them both during our last family dinner. I didn’t hold back, and I let everyone know what they’d been doing behind our backs. It caused a huge scene, my parents were devastated, and my sister-in-law was in tears. It was like a bomb went off, and I’m not sure if our family can recover from it.

Now my wife says I overreacted and that I shouldn’t have humiliated everyone like that. She claims we could have handled it privately, and my brother is saying the same thing. But I felt like I needed everyone to know the truth because keeping it a secret felt like enabling them to continue lying.

AITA for exposing their affair in front of our families? Should I have handled it differently, or was my reaction justified given the betrayal I felt?

Thanks in advance for your thoughts. I know this is a messy situation, but I need some perspective.